Todd Stadler's blog

Least appealing spam subject line

I found a spam in my filters the other day with the subject line "Experience puberty again (the sex part)".

Ah yes, thank goodness for that parenthetical clarification. Had they not added it, I would have assumed they were peddling a cream that made pimples break out all over my face and made hair grow in places it had not previously (forehead? palms? what's left?) And clearly, the demand for such a cream would be great.

But no, they're talking about the sex part of puberty. Oh, those heady days! Yes, whatever product they're selling, it allows you to relive that halcyon era when I had no sex whatsoever and was, in fact, terrified by the same girls to whom I was attracted, living perpetually in fear of kissing the wrong way. I think I'd actually prefer the acne.

I suppose that there are those for whom puberty was, sadly, the high point of their sexual life, but I imagine they are few.

In conclusion, this spammer clearly lacks marketing acumen. This subject line has none of the appeal of, say, someone telling me "declaimg Med Hist PLo", as another spam recently enticed me. I can only assume that this poorly crafted spam signals the end of the spamming era.